Already 17 now ya'll! But still am small and petite. Despite that I've got a big heart and a huge ego. You'll love me as I spill my greatest ups and downs moments here. Have fun reading, potatoes :-)
Naida xoxo

Saturday, August 30, 2008
How Complex

Do you know how it feels like to be cheated on? It hurts. A lot. Especially when you trust that person so much you think that person is the one. The words that come out from his/her mouth are sweet. Too sweet that it'll hurt you when you finally find out that he or she is actually faithless. 

I've been there. I felt it once. It felt like my heart is crushed, crushed, and crushed. I wasted a lot of tears. I was filled with remorse. But I'm keeping it away. I don't care about it anymore. It's just a past. That was then. And now? Someone else has become the-me-then. She may not know it but God knows I'm doing it. I tried stopping. I tried quitting. It's too late. We go too far. 

We aren't dating. But we are, emotionally. And as a matter of fact, I am filled with jealousy. Knowing that he still loves his girlfriend, too. I mean if he doesn't love her anymore, why continuing the relationship? I'm not going to persuade him to break up. I don't want him to do it either. Haaahh, the same old me. Same old patient me. 

I just want to stop.  I feel evil. I'm hurting her. I'm the third-person.

xoxo

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Tuesday, August 5, 2008
Now and Then

I'm so tired right now. It feels like I could sleep for the whole day - but I know I can't. Since yesterday I started my very first day of private lesson at home. It was really tiring and I was really sleepy. But this is for my own good so ya I just gotta enjoy my 4 days in a row private lesson in a week. Lalalalalaaaaaaa. 

Life in 68 has been quite enjoyable. I finally have friends to spend my time with at school. But now and then is different. That is why I also miss my life back then when I was a Binusian. I miss CIMS and 10 B so mucho. Frankly writing, I don't have any intention of going back to Binus. I mean the school's getting suckier each single day. With all the rules that the fvckn principal created, I feel lucky moving to another school. But I miss my frieeeeendsssssssss. I know things won't be the same. Like I said ... Now and then ... ;(

p.s: can't wait for Saturday! :)

xoxo

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Sunday, August 3, 2008
Random-ing

"Well I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did
 And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did
 And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did
 And you didn't mean to love me back, 
 but I know you did"

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Saturday, August 2, 2008
Whatever

I posted the previous post randomly, whilst the song was on. The lyrics' nice isn't it :)

Nyways, today was tiring yet soo memorable. Me and my friends made a plan to throw Jo a farewell party, a surprise one. And yesss we did surprise him! :) Aww how sad, he's going to move to Manilla. I'm no longer a binusian, Jo's moving, life in binus has change... As time passes by, as we get older, life will get more complicated and rocky. I just hope I could take life as it comes. Even if it will knock my guard away and leave me lifeless and hopeless. 

xoxo

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Random

"Sejujurnya kadang aku pun tak mengerti
 peran apa yang kita jalani
 seindahnya dunia ini takkan seindah
 bila aku milikimu, dan aku milikmu..."

...Dan Ketika - Maliq & d'essentials

:)

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